Heart-Centered Self-Care

Ah, November. It’s the time in the Wheel of the Year where the weather (finally) has turned a bit colder, the leaves have made their flight to the ground, and the darkness has become more palpable. Our attention turns toward staying warm, making hearty comfort meals, and often to one of the most heart-centered, and sometimes, heart-wrenching times of the year…the holidays.

It is also a time of turning inward, as the earth is doing, of being indoors more, feeling the need for rest and rejuvenation after the fire and heat of the summer and spring seasons and all the buzzy energy that those times bring.

A bit of dissonance has always existed in the fall for me, as I feel exhausted by the end of summer, the start of the school year for my kids, and the earlier and earlier build-up every year to the holiday season. It doesn’t ‘feel’ like a time of inward focus and rest because of these external pressures.

So, I am learning to turn toward the natural cycles of the earth to stay in the flow of what my body and intuition tell me it’s time to do despite the demands of life, and I invite you to join me.

How does one turn inward as the earth and the trees and the animals and plants do, as a method of self-care, and coping with whatever the outside world, our families, our work, is serving up? You’ve probably read about meditation, breathing, a focus on the body in general…I do and will talk a lot about those things in my work with clients and here…but today I am going to focus on a specific part of us that is so deserving of our inward gaze.

The heart.

This is not a post about cardiac care from a medical point of view- I am not a physician, but I am a steward of the heart, and I’m going to offer you a way to care for yours. So you can practice some preventative self-care, and maybe avoid some of the more chronic and sadly end-stage interventions for the heart that many Americans experience.

Ready for some stats? Heart disease is the number one cause of death in the United States. This is definitely not breaking news, I know, but it is worth restating. Also, women who work as social workers (ahem…this was sobering for me) have a 36% higher risk of developing heart disease than other professions. Retail cashiers, and other healthcare provider roles were ranked highly as well. See Worst Jobs For Women's Health.

Ugh. But not surprising given the stressful nature of these roles, and the nature of life in this world right now for all of us. Caring for the heart is not just about what we eat, how we move, or the medicines we may take to address a medical diagnosis.

A simple practice I’ll share now is one thing you can do to take care of your heart daily that doesn’t involve medicine, or the gym (not knocking those- they are often needed and recommended!)...IF you make the choice to practice it.

Self care is a practice. Yes. Read it again. If you make the time to brush your teeth twice a day, you can do this.

Cue Heart Coherence. This is a technique developed by The Heart Math Institute, and I teach it to many of my clients. In short, your heart has its own intelligence, and its electromagnetic field is even bigger than that of our brain. If we acknowledge this, it makes taking care of the heart way more important in my brain-mind (and heart-mind). You can use this technique to center yourself, to turn your focus inward, when you feel anxious, or as a simple ritual to start or end your day. It has been shown to help those with trauma cope with the symptoms and memories of their experiences. I find it incredibly nurturing, and a lovely way to begin to build body awareness, and it can be a refuge of self-care done anywhere, anytime.

How do we do the quick Heart Coherence Technique?

You can do this with eyes closed or open, however you feel comfortable.

Step 1: place your right hand over your heart, to bring your awareness there (like you would if you were doing the Pledge of Allegiance).

Step 2: Begin to deepen your breath in and out…through your nose only, through you nose and out your mouth..it doesn’t matter…however it naturally flows, to a count of 4 or 5 in, and out. Just let it flow from in to out and back again, not pausing at the bottom or top.

Step 3: Visualize your breath flowing in and out of your heart, as you continue to breathe.

Step 4: Call up a visual memory of a moment of gratitude, appreciation, a peak experience or an accomplishment. It could be a small thing, like the smile on your child’s face, watching your dog romp, a kiss you shared with your partner, the smell of a hot cup of coffee, your favorite essential oil fragrance, how you felt when you PRed in the gym, a work milestone you are proud of, that test you aced…you get the flavor of this.

Step 5: Continue breathing, visualizing your breath entering and exiting your heart, and play that awesome movie in your mind, for 1-3 minutes. Or however long or short you would like. A few minutes is good if you can do it…it gives your brain, heart and nervous system some time to settle…which is also a lovely benefit that I think we could all use these days.

That’s it!

You are creating ‘coherence’ between your brain-brain and your heart-brain. You are linking these energy centers, or the third eye and heart chakras, or two of your bodies’ most important electromagnetic fields, and making like the trees…rooting down, centering, getting quiet like they do for the coming winter. Being still. Acknowledging the great job your heart does for you…all the time…24/7, 365. Giving it some of the love that it gives you every second of the day.

How great is that?

Try it out, let me know how it goes. Share it with your Loved Ones. If you come see me, we can practice together.

As always, I am here for therapy, sessions and questions, if it feels light for you.

Be well!